When years pass by

What's more important? The possession of material things or be surrounded by family and friends?

Photo by Abigail Keenan on Unsplash

I remember how I was, spoke a lady in the circle of friends.

Impetuous, I'd speak without thinking. I'd said what came to mind and thought she owned the world. Capriciously, I wanted things my way. And screamed over and over when they weren't. Meticulous, I'd keep everything to the smallest detail. A picture that was one inch askew on the wall, or the ornament on the table.

I would enter the house with my eyes looking for something out of place just for the pleasure of putting them in place. And would complain about whoever didn't put it exactly as she wished.

My closet was impeccable. All clothes lined up, divided by season, by colors. I could look for clothes in the dark and find them. But, would shout to anyone who dared to fiddle with the closet. I'd know if anyone had even opened the closet. And it was a reason for a great discussion.

The books were separated by author, by subject and in alphabetical order to facilitate the search. Naturally, no one could touch them unless I picked it up handed it over recommending: "Watch the cover. Don't knead. Wash your hands thoroughly before opening the book."

Yes, I was like that. Nothing anyone did was good enough for me.

I cleaned the house, because nobody did it like me. And it consumed the hours in ordering, aligning, grouping, adjusting. Everything always had to be impeccable.

Time has passed

But time has passed and I found out that I was wrong in many things.

When my sister abruptly left in a car accident, I felt my heart break. Looking at the empty house, I wondered what it was worth to be in order, impeccable? I would give anything for her to be there so she would come in and mess up my books, my dishes, my things. I wanted to see her opening my closet, choosing clothes to wear, messing up with the order that was standing there, unused.

Then my brother and my mother died too.

With each death, I discovered that the best thing is to have a home for people to come in and feel good, not being suffocated. I found that more important than anything, those people, not the stuff, were the meaning of my life.

And then, I changed.

I still like things tidy, in order but without exaggeration. My nephews come into my house and play. And they jump and I sit with them on the floor to read stories, look at pictures. And while we read, we eat popcorn, chocolate and drink juice. How good it is to taste stories with someone eager for curiosity even if your fingers are dirty with chocolate or greasy with popcorn?

My closet is no longer untouched. The nieces love to look for something different to use. Even if it is for the costume dance with their friends.

I learned to accept and respect the work of others, thanking them.

The hours I would spend washing, cleaning, polishing, I now dedicate to children, young people, my loves.

Yes, I have changed a lot. Life taught me.

Too bad I had to lose so many loved ones in order to learn. I could have been much happier, a long time ago. However, there's always time and I thank God, however, that I woke up in time to still enjoy many joys on Earth.

I sincerely hope that none of you need to go through this to learn.

Adapted from Momento Espírita, originally published on May 28, 2014.

See Also

• The Power of Love
• Weighted observation
• The most important bridge
• Bridge of Life
• A Thinking Power
• Divine Poem

Teachers who make a difference

An inspiring teacher can make a great difference in our lives. Here's how.

Photo by Andrew Ebrahim on Unsplash

It was in the mid-twentieth century that the President of the New York City Court of Special Sessions came to expose his ideas about the treatment of primary criminals.

It was a conference before magistrates of the State of Missouri and, at one point, he stated that his attitude towards delinquency among young people originated from an intelligent and affectionate treatment that he was given by one of his previous teachers.

He didn't mention her name, but at the end of the meeting the judge approached him and asked if he had referred to Miss. Varner, adding that other judges gathered there were deeply influenced by her too.

No less than four judges came to speak on the matter.

One of America's most respected lawyers, Judge Laurance Hyde, told him: "She was a wonderful teacher."

She taught her students not to be content with learning only what was in the book. She taught them to question the author, challenge their statements and always seek to know the subject better.

That was how the students discovered the pleasure of learning.

And the President who believed that only for him she was a private advisor, a guide through high school and a mentor until he graduated in Law, realized that this admirable woman had exercised the same influence over hundreds of students who passed through that school.

And each of them considered her to be their private advisor.

Generals, taxi drivers, farmers, magistrates, scientists, admirals, senators, all benefited from her affection and dedication. She has exercised her influence over hundreds of people.

When, at school, there was a boy who all the other teachers considered an incorrigible undisciplined, she said: "there is no such thing". And she would treat the teenager with such love and understanding that the transformation took place.

The police chief himself, more than once, brought good guys accused of illegal activities to her presence. Knowing these were acts without major consequences, but still contrary to the law, she would talk to them in a way they'd never get into trouble again.

Final Thoughts

Calla Edington Varner was a teacher who made a difference. How much we need teachers here like these days. Teachers who have their civic duties in mind and remember that in a democracy everyone matters.

Teachers who believe that each one of us can make a big difference, making small or significant changes regardless of where we are.

Certainly, teachers like that exist. And to these, our great and special tribute.

Above all, the vows that they do not falter, even in the face of the indifference of many, or even discouraging remarks that the investment is not worth.

We also call on those of us who have children at school to become aware of the efforts of such special heroes, who dedicate themselves far beyond duty.

Silent heroes in classrooms for hours and hours. Dedicated heroes in their homes, preparing classes, studying and researching.

Heroes who teach, who enlighten minds, who feed hearts with their affectionate and enlightening presence.

Adapted from Momento Espírita, originally published on May 15, 2019, based on an article by Irving Ben Cooper, on Magazine Readers’s Digest, in October 1957.

See Also

• The Power of Love
• Weighted observation
• The most important bridge
• Bridge of Life
• A Thinking Power
• Divine Poem